Creating “Right Relationship”

We are surrounded by relationships.  Our partner, our parents, our friends, our family, even “Paul” who works at the gas station.  All are part of a community web that we create.  We are constantly forming new relationships, managing the ones we have, and sometimes letting go of the ones that are no longer serving us.  Relationships can carry us through many emotions.  Many, many emotions.

So what is the right relationship?IMG_4086

Last Saturday, I attended my first sweat lodge.  Never having experienced one before, I was amazed by each element that created this night.  I followed the movements of others and listened closely as we repeated mantras and prayers that have been passed down over many, many generations.

The sweat lodge was referred to as the womb, a sacred place of magic, spirit and birth.  Envision a dome shaped wood frame covered in heavy blankets; such thick-layered blankets that all of the light from the outside was shut out, and all of the heat was kept in.  And all of us (about twenty) healed and released in this heat.

There were many words spoken that night, words of intention, gratitude, healing, love, spirit, but there were a few words that stuck with me long after I had left that magical place.  “Be in right relationship”.

When I first heard this said that night, I thought of the people who are in my life, the ones who have been in my life for a long time and the ones who I am just getting to know.  I thought about how grateful I am for these relationships and for all that they provide me with.

When I heard “get into right relationship”, I thought about some of the changes that I want to make in my own life, resentments that I want to let go of and judgments that are not serving a positive purpose.

“When you put love into any relationship, there is no room for anything else.  There is no room for hate, for judgements, for war.”

Whoa.  This was the answer to how I would release these judgments and resentments that were only causing harm.  By putting love into any situation, there is no room for anything but love.  Of course, putting this into practice can be extremely challenging at times, but with love, all can be healed.  At times of great frustration or fear, this is the perfect thought to come back to.

“Get into right relationship with yourself”.

After all of this time sitting here and thinking about everyone in my life, I had totally forgotten about myself.  How do I talk to myself each day?  How am I treating myself?  Am I putting love into every encounter with my own existence?  How is my relationship with ME?  How can one have a healthy relationship with someone else while living an un-loving relationship with the self?  This was something that needed to go up on the vision board (and it did).  I need this reminder.  Sometimes we get so caught up in the struggles with others, with events, with daily stressors, that we forget to create and practice love for ourselves; our own body, mind and spirit.

Since last Saturday night, these words have been playing like a record in my head.  “Get in right relationship”

What does this mean for you?  What relationships in your life need tending to?

In my opinion, this work is never complete, but by practicing daily with small steps, you can teach yourself to put love into all aspects of life.  What will you do today?

with extra love,



An Excuse For Simplicity

As I drove around my neighborhood yesterday afternoon assessing the previous nights hurricane damages, I could not help but think about all of the cities, homes and front yards in so many states that have been littered with broken branches, heavy tree trunks and other debris.  Being without power and cell service, I wasn’t able to hear the news, but I could only imagine the devastation that others were experiencing.  My sympathy was with those that were affected by this storm in any way, and still is.

For me, this hurricane caused some “speed bumps” in the road; Tim and I lost power on Monday afternoon, we were confined to our driveway and the few streets around our apartment by fallen trees and power lines, and judging by the mess of telephone poles, trees and electrical wires in the street in front of our place, we will most likely not be regaining power anytime soon.  At the same time, we were blessed with the safety that our home provided, the company of each other and our pup, and the opportunity to get creative about how we would spend our time without the internet, television, or electricity.

An excuse to bring out my stash of candles always excites me, so I had the house prepared for candle light way before the sun went down.  There is something so soothing about surrounding yourself with such soft light; it makes me feel like I am living a life of simplicity.  I used that feeling over the next few days and dove into thoughts and ideas of how I would spend my time, simply.

Writing.  I wrote in journal form, I wrote in exercise form, and I wrote in lists.  For me, writing in any form provides instant comfort.  I love seeing thoughts, feelings and even “to-dos” written out on a page.  This experience of writing by candlelight made me realize that I don’t make enough time for this in my life, something I really love to do.

This feeling continued on.  I read, something else I love to do but don’t make enough time for.  I read healing words from Caroline Myss and inspiring stories from Bernie Sigel.  Surrounded by quiet and low light, these powerful books brought me into a space of love and gratitude, of power and motivation.  I realized that bringing these kinds of words into my life on a daily basis would provide me with a feeling that I don’t get from a TV show or from reading a blog post.  The authenticity of sitting with a book is one that cannot be matched.

I took a walk, and have taken many since.  Having a connection with nature is something I feel very strongly about and I make a constant effort to include it in my daily life, but to walk around and witness the changes in my usual surroundings after a storm such as this can modify your view.  To witness the power that Mother Nature has over us seems to put our existence in perspective, and the respect that we should show her constantly is magnified at a time like this.  She is a mighty force.

The connections that I have felt with my loved ones over these past few days have been a beautiful reminder of the support and love that I have in my life.  It is amazing where a conversation can drift off to without the sounds of music, TV or any of our other electronic distractions.  Sometimes we can take these relationships for granted, and during this time I have realized the strong beautiful people that I hold in my life and the gratitude that I need to show them everyday.

I can continue on about how I chose to spend my days living in this simplicity but that is not my reason for writing this.  My purpose for sharing with you the last few days of my life and my “ah-ha” moments is in hopes of igniting emotions in you, new realizations or thoughts that may have come to you in this time of disconnect.  Maybe we can all take something from this and continue with it even when our power, televisions, internet, phones, computers, and daily living comes back into play.  Is there anything that you will hold on to?

With love and simple, wonderful things,